Dear Agnes,
I am in the search for my Renaissance man and I think I have met him. He is charming, handsome, and strong like a wall. I never thought I would find someone like this... There is one problem though. He doesn't notice me!! :-( In my dreams, I wish he would notice me and say hi, but dreams don't come true. What should I do, Agnes?? I'm in agony!
- Damsel in Distress
- Damsel in Distress
Dear Damsel in Distress,
Build up the courage and talk him! You can't miss on a chance like this. What if you regret not doing anything and you don't see him again. I was in a little pickle similar to this myself....
Just kidding. I'm Agnes. Guys come to me. I rock.
- Agnes
Just kidding. I'm Agnes. Guys come to me. I rock.
- Agnes
Dear Agnes,
It was 57 days since I've lost her. I miss her warm touch and her angelic face. The Black Plague has really ruined my life. I don't know when I will go and it doesn't matter anymore. I wish she was here. I don't really know what to do anymore. I have had many thoughts of going on vacation myself, but I don't think I'll ever do it. How do I relieve this pain and suffering?
- Charles
- Charles
Dear Charles,
I apologize for your loss. All I can really say is sorry and stay in there. Sometimes, life has walls and you're put at a halt, but you have to break it down to get through. I hope you understand what I'm writing to you. Just remember the good times you had with her and appreciate those. Life moves on and so should you. That's what she would have wanted for you.
The Black Plague sucks.
Best regards to you.
- Agnes
The Black Plague sucks.
Best regards to you.
- Agnes
Dear Agnes,
Oh Agnes, something terrible has overcome me! My horses - my poor horses, they've disappeared. I love my horses with all my heart, and it kills me - shreds my soul into pieces, that someone so evil could have taken them away. I did not know such evil could exist in this world. My prime suspect is my friend, Sir Raleigh. He is a good friend of mine, whom I have always invited over for a cup of tea. However, the suspicious thing is that he is the only person who knows that I do indeed have horses, and that I hide them in my secret basement. He is also the only person who knows that I keep the horses double chained in heavy metal in case they try to escape. I wish I never told him where I kept the key to unlock the horses were. How could he have done this? I trusted him. Should I trust anyone ever again?
- xxhOrSeLoVerx
- xxhOrSeLoVerx
Dear xxhOrSeLoVerx,
I apologize for your loss, but I hope you know that you need to learn how to treat your horses better. Horses should not be kept in an underground basement, locked in heavy chains. Horses should be out in the wild plains, running around freely. I should know. I was a horse once. Anyway, it appears that your friend, Raleigh, just wants to save the horses from your mistreatment. However, it is true that he did abuse your trust. My advice is that you confront him and talk the problem out. You should also think twice about how you treat your animals. Don't let this problem affect your ability to trust.
Good luck. To your horses. Not you.
- Agnes
Good luck. To your horses. Not you.
- Agnes
Dear Agnes,
I am an aspiring artist. When I look at my art, I'm like, "Whoa, how can someone be so talented?" I think I'm as good as Michelangelo. However, many around me disagree. They say my work looks like chicken-scratch. I think they're just jealous. Someone told me I should stop painting; for it is nearly blinding them. It was my mom. Anyways, what should I do, Agnes?? Should I give up my hopes and dreams? Should I continue? Sigh, life decisions...
- Actually, better than Michel
- Actually, better than Michel
Dear Actually, better than Michel,
You should really quit.
- your girl, Agnes
- your girl, Agnes
Dear Agnes,
I am in love with this woman. She is so helpful, so caring, and so wise. She embodies every virtue a man wants in a woman. However, the only problem is, I don't know who she is and what she looks like. That woman is you, Agnes. I love you. Will you marry me?
- Anonymous pursuer
- Anonymous pursuer
Dear Anonymous Pursuer,
No.
-Agnes
-Agnes